New 52 Round 2, Week 3-4

I'm not sure how this happened again and I got way behind again, but I'm trying to catch up. Last time I looked at these two weeks, I dropped Birds of Prey, Captain Atom, Legion of Superheroes, Supergirl, and Blackhawks. I actually gave Supergirl a second look based on the idea that her vs. Superman might be interesting... it wasn't. I also said that The Dark Knight was dropped and I gave it a second look... While it wasn't good in the least, I feel its the train wreck book that I'm going to follow. This week, I drop several books so let's see who makes the cut...

Batman 2

For me, this continues to be a standout book and it comes as no surprise since Snyder is at the helm. I'm not sure how this connects to Nightwing's storyline, but it seems to feature him pretty prominently. The interaction between Bruce and Dick is really great. Like old friends more than estranged family. When Dick is accused of murder, he takes Dick’s explanation at face value, which makes it seem like a trust moment where he’s cool because they’re family… only we find out that Bruce is a bit of a cock (calling him a dick in presence of Dick doesn’t sound right) and didn’t trust him all that much after all. Dick, used to all of this, plays it off like it’s the usual Bruce thing, but even Bruce seems a little disappointed in himself:
Anxious to see where this whole Court of Owls bit is going, but I'm hooked.

Verdict: A. Solid book that I can easily say is in my top 5 books of the reboot.

Blue Beetle 2

Really, there isn't much to say about this book in a good or bad sense. It gets the "guy with brand new powers" gig down really well, but it also should come with some Spanish to English translations. I get the concept of having a level of diversity in the new DCU, but I know maybe 10 Spanish words, and although I see 5 of them used and I can use context clues... I'm still lost for bits of this.

Verdict: C+. Just being average is fine sometimes, but this series needs to pick itself up if it wants to keep me reading. Series is still on probation.

Catwoman 2

For me, this is really a mixed book as well. I really hated the post-coital conversation between Batman and her, but when the two run into each other as Bruce and Selina at a party later, I loved their rapport. The series is really strong, playing Selina as a mastermind who has gang members kill each other so she doesn't get her hands dirty, and there is swashbuckling abound. The problem comes at the end, when Selina's friend and confidant- a strong, non Bat-family supporting character, gets executed so that we can meet the villain of this arc- an Outsider knockoff known as Bone.

Verdict: B-. I almost dropped this thing after that ending, but I honestly think that I need to ride this story out a little longer, so it will maintain probationary status.

DCU Presents 2

Probably the biggest jump in styles from the last issue to now, this book is infinitely better this issue. Its no longer about the mere possession of people and helping them, and more about demon nightclubs and fighting monsters. We left Boston in the body of an amputee war vet who is playing a game of chicken with a servant of Rama Kushna. She helps Boston get some understanding of his role, but its not enough, so after getting the guy hooked up with a pretty girl in a bar, Boston ditches the body and heads to the Moonstone Club, which is guarded by some serious anti-magic security. After bodyhopping, we find out that the Librarian is the one that he's looking for, but getting to her will be hard since most of the creatures in the club can sense his presence. Cue this scene:
If I ever fight a blind person, I will use that line. You have my word. Going deeper into the building he ends up in the actual nightclub area filled with all sorts of monsters and since they can all see him, he does what comes naturally:
As they say, dying is easy- comedy is hard. Boston possesses a big zombie type monster and goes to see the Librarian- an old woman who is actually a lesser fallen angel charged with keeping tabs on every living and some dead creatures. Boston finally forces her to find his book, and as much as he wants to read it, he cant for a few reasons: its in braille AND Aramaic, and the book is one in a thousand volumes, all linked to other people's stories. And you probably shouldn't ask this woman how anything ends... she kinda sucks about revealing spoilers:
Verdict: B+. This is a really solid book that I am eager to keep reading. Despite having a major downer cliffhanger, its all good because I got to see a ghost do standup.

Green Lantern Corps 2

Last issue, we saw an entire planet and two GL's get decimated by some mysterious and invisible assassins. This one picks up with our team finding the bodies. There are seven Corps members: Guy, John, Isamot Kol, Hannu, Sherrif, Vandor,and a female Lantern. I tried to their name, but I couldn't find much. Isamot is very caring about the Lanterns who were killed as the three of them went through training together, and demands that they take the bodies to Oa for proper burial. We jump to another planet where the trees are being sucked up by the same force. Luckily, the Corps is in the area and our team goes to help the planet. Isamot loses it when he catches sight of the attacking force, and blows up their power core, and while he saves the planet, he then disapears into this black void where he gets attacked. Back on the planet, the team interrogates the enemy and they claim that now that they have everything they need, the real plan can begin. A portal opens up above and Isamots body, without arms or legs falls to the ground. Luckily, he's still alive because he put his rin on his long reptile tongue and we are assured he will grow his limbs back... if they can survive the onslaught of hundreds of soldiers pouring out of the same portal.

Verdict: B-. While I love this series, this was not one of the better issues. I still can't really wrap my mind around the bad guys here, so I will hope it gets better with time and give this issue a pass.

Justice League 2

It doesn't feel like its been almost two months since this first issue came out, but here we are. This thing is really a far stronger issue than the first one, giving us a hero vs. hero fight between a Superman too raw in the game to show restraint and a Green Lantern too stubborn to know when to fall back. I kind of want to see Green Lantern try to take another shot at Superman somewhere down the line. I love the idea that he’s pissy over not being king shit in the DCU. The makeshift team feels pretty organic so far, so it’s going to be interesting to see how Wonder Woman and Aquaman round things out. The very discussion between Vic Stone and his father about how worthless human sports are in the coming days of supermen has me very curious on how Johns is going to define this version of Cyborg, now that Vic Stone has been virtually destroyed by the coming Parademons. I have a feeling he’s going to be very similar to Captain America, tethered to his humanity despite his heightened status. We also get a look at the Flash here, and I have to say that this Flash is above and beyond better written here than his title role book. And I like that Barry and Hal already have a connection as heroes and friends, so that Hal can just hit Barry up on the cell, and he'll come running. I'm not a huge fan of how Batman tries to referee this fight, but it makes sense that he would be more sensible than the three warring heroes. Fun interaction:
Verdict: A. Another solid week for this series helmed by two of the most powerful people in the DC company. This is the New 52's spearhead for a reason and this book is just fantastic. Also in my top five books of the relaunch.

Nightwing 2

So the title of this issue is "Saiko Killer" and naming your book and antagonist after the catchiest of Talking Heads songs is a good way to get into my graces. While not very developed yet, I do like Saiko’s design and he has the makings of a strong rogue. The comic is pretty much split into two things. Nightwing vs. Saiko acts as the bread of the sandwich and it’s pretty damn cool. The middle half of it is exposition development that appears to be for shaping the series’ status quo. That is, if Dick Grayson owning the Haley circus, adn the circus itself, lasts longer than six issues. It could be a good way to differ this series from Bruce’s books and give it its own identity outside of the smug street fighting and acrobatics. It still hasn’t hit its stride as much as I’d like, but I’m confident in what’s been given to us so far.

Red Hood and the Outlaws 2

Two issues in and I still don't know how to feel about this issue. On one hand, its getting a lot of undeserved bad press for the way the series has treated Starfire, but I feel that its a new take on a character and I'm trying to keep my mind open about the series as best I can. On the other hand, this thing is really doing Jason Todd justice, but it makes the tagalong couple of Roy and Starfire look really unnecessary. And unnecessary in this comic translates as annoying. I like the Ra's al Ghul backstory and the fact that Jason, while he has no problem killing, has a certain honor and code about what he's doing and what was done to him.

Verdict: C. I can't drop this thing, but I rarely look forward to reading it, so I gues that keeps it on probation for a bit longer.

Wonder Woman 2
There really isn't much to say on this book. Its very fast paced and we don't spend hardly anytime with our title character, but that's true of all the characters. Everything seems to be going too fast and no one gets much of an inspection. We have always gotten the origin that Diana was formed in the sand and clay by her mother, and then given life, but the way this comic is going, it looks like Zeus is going to turn out to be her father. Certainly an intersting possibility.

Verdict: C+. Its not great or all that enticing, but I feel like there's a good story here. I will keep reading with the hopes it gets better.

All Star Western 2

While this entry is certainly a lot more action packed than the first issue, it kinda feels flat overall. We spend a lot more time with action shots than getting some of the Hex/Arkham buddy cop moments. The biggest problem for me is the art here makes almost everyone look the same. No one looks normal in the whole issue. I'm all for gritty, but I think there's a limit to everything.

Verdict: C+. Its not a bad comic, but I don't think its even remotely as good as the first issue. I'm sticking for a while.

Aquaman 2

Again, we have an issue that just doesn't match up to its predecessor. We have some pirahna creatures that are new to everyone in the story and go on a murder spree, but at no point do you ever feel a level of danger or concern for any of the characters. We get a little time with Arthur and Mera as they talk about his childhood and how his father never wanted him to be around water. The fun character moments are killed quickly so that Arthur can fight the evil and hungry sea creatures.

Verdict: C. Another issue that's weaker and gets a lower grade. This just isn't a good week, to be honest, and we are just gettign started.

Batman: The Dark Knight 2

Oh Lord... where can I begin with this book? A bunch of villains have gotten hopped up on some Venom mixed with something that reduces fear (wink, wink towards the probable villain here). Despite the cover seeming very serious about this Two Face fight, its over in the first few pages, because Dent's eyes just begin to bleed like crazy. Batman is far more focused on tracking down who this White Rabbit is and puts Alfred on the case:
Apparently, all over town there are reports of hopped up villains destroying Gotham. Batgirl tries to stop Zsasz, the Birds of Prey are attacked by Clock King, Batwoman faces off with the Cavalier, and Robin and Nightwing team up to take on...
Yes, the Ventriloquist (who is apparently back from the dead in the reboot). This all seems kind of fun overall, but the dialogue is so choppy that its a pain to read. Naturally, our Rabbit shows up again and Batman chases her onto a subway car where he has to deal with some Joker thugs, and discovers someone killed some of the thugs before he got there. Bruce continues to chase the rabbit until he reaches the last car and we are treated to something that almost made me burn the issue on the spot.
Oh cool, I also played Arkham Asylum. This is just awful. One of the most famous lines from one of the best superheroes of all time and this is how it gets used. Its an absolute abomination.

Verdict: D-. Much like a train wreck or car accident, you can't really look away from this book, and as enraged as I am by how bad this thing is, its at least eliciting an emotion and this was a tough week to accomplish that goal. Against my own better judgement, I'm going to keep going.

The Flash 2

This kinda leads right into this issue of Flash for a reason. This thing is beyond boring. Like... I was so bored by it as I reread it for the review, I actually left halfway to get a soda so I wouldn't fall asleep. We get one great page where Barry can see and feel everything in the city at once, using his brain at Flash speeds, but its instantly killed so we can get some backstory on a friend of Barry's that was in the military... cloning... power outage. Damn, almost went to sleep again. This thing is beyond slow and betrays the title in a pretty atrocious way.

Verdict: D-. I really tried to give this comic a chance but I'm not going to waste time on a comic that is this uninteresting. I was going to put this one on probation because I don't want to abandon the character, but I think Justice League has this guy covered. DROPPED.

The Fury of Firestorm: The Nuclear Men 2

To be honest, I don't even remember much of this issue. There's a big fight between Fury and the assassins, and finally the two guys seperate themselves back out and talk with Tonya about how they can't ever go back home. Sure enough, cops and government agents are each going to their respective houses looking for them and tellign their parents that they all were involved in some deep cover terrorist plot that involved killing teachers, students, and blowing up the school. Meanwhile, the teens are stirred awake by some mercenaries known as the Hyena team, and they might be the single most annoying team I have ever had the displeasure of reading. They are apparently tweakers of Joker venom and constantly giggle at the end of every sentence. The two Firestorms are so uncoordinated since they just got their powers that they just trip over themselves and get guns to their heads. End of issue.

Verdict: C. I've said this a few times- its fine as an issue, but it just ends up as a flash-in-the-pan. I like the Firestorm system we had coming from Brightest Day, but this reboot version just doesn't compare. It's still on probtion because I don't want to give up on Gail Simone, but my patience is running out.

Green Lantern: New Guardians 2

Times Square gets a free-for-all from members from 5 of the seven Corps. Kyle Rayner has rings of the other six lights wanting to be on his fingers, something he doesn't want, but Munk of the Indigos, Fatility of the Star Sapphires, Bleez of the Red Lanterns, and Arkillo of the Sinestro Corps think he's stolen the rings. Arkillo and Kyle fight in the subway while Fatality fights and imprisons Bleez above ground. Munk just watches and tries to take out Fatality when the moment arises. Just as Kyle is about to fight Fatality, his ring begins to power up far beyond normal which can only mean that a Blue Lantern is nearby. Saint Walker arrives to get Kyle out of there and take him to Ganthet on Oa. Walker brings up a very intersting point on the way- that there is only one Orange ring, and if it is with Kyle now, where is Larfleeze? Walker doesn't travel to Oa, as he is banned from the planet, but wishes Kyle well, as he heads to the Guardian's council hall. To his dismay, gantet has been lobotomized and his emotions have been removed. The Guardians see the rings and lose it trying to capture them and imprison Kyle. The rings sense danger and go onto Kyle's fingers, transforming him into the Gray Lantern.

Verdict: B-. I was a big fan of the Blackest Night and Brightest Day books becuase it gave us a steady look at the various Corps and their members,a dn I feel like this book is trying to keep that feeling intact. Personally, I'm not a huge fan of this group as I was the last set of Guardians, but I think this book has potential.

I, Vampire 2

This was somehow more boring than the Flash... the previous issue had so much potential. It was a story about two vampire characters that have different viewpoints on humans and how they used to be friends and lovers with each other. The issue ends with Mary, the antagonist telling that she had sent vampires out to kill all the humans they could. This issue is a story about the same two characters that have the same different viewpoints on humans and how they used to be friends and incredible lovers together. This issue ends with Mary, the antagonist telling the audience herself, that she had sent vampires out to kill all the humans they could. You see my problem? Its the same freakin' book, just from her perspective. Which is actually the same perspective she had when she spoke in the last isssue... this thing was just bad.

Verdict: D-. Shame on you Fialkov for making me reread the same issue twice with only some action scenes thrown in. I thought about putting this on probation, but I would rather not- DROPPED.

Justice League Dark

This issue should have been titled: Deadman Needs to get Laid. Why, you ask? I'll explain in a moment. We open on Zatanna getting attacked by shadow creatures, and barely survives by encasing herself in a protection bubble. Meanwhile Constantine gets the crap beat out of him so he can use the pain to get stronger and use magic. The focus of the issue however is on Deadman and Dove. Boston keeps taking people's bodies over so he can physically be with Dove. She gets mad at him and tells him she won't sleep with a man that's not him. The possessed guy's wife comes in and assaults her husband for macking on Dove and Deadman tries to fix the situation while Dove goes home. He leaves the body and follows her home, just in time for a blonde woman- June Moone- to arrive. She's an avatar of the Enchantress, and she's come to Deadman for help. By possessing her, she wants Enchantress out of her mind. Deadman goes to work, while Dove goes outside and cries. Still possessing the girl's body, Boston goes to comfort Dawn and attempts to hit on her. Dove slaps him/her and leaves. Now free of Deadman, June warns Deadman that he's in danger because he helped her. That's pretty much it.

Verdict: B-. I know there's a lot of story to try and get through here, but man... this thing just seems kinda dead in the water. Like Deadman's sex life. OOOOOhhhhh!!!!!! But seriously, I'm kinda getting bored and I need more Constantine soon. Probationary status.

The Savage Hawkman 2

Art is important to a comic, but it shouldn't be all that a comic is. This comic has a story where a bird/Egyptian/alien based hero fights the demon from A Night on Terror Mountain, and for some reason, its seriously the worst written thing. The art is beautiful and there are some shots here that I honestly would put above my bed as a poster, but the writing is so awful and carboard that I'm bored to death. Teh bad guy escapes and joins with other evil aliens, and as much as I'd like learn more about them and what the plan is, I can't read anymore of this. I may pick up the next issue and look at the pictures, but the writings just not worth it.

Verdict: D. It doesn't fail because of how beautiful this thing is, but seriously, this writing is garbage. No question that its DROPPED.

Superman 2

This issue feels more like an episode of the aniamted series, rather than a comic. Maybe its because of teh one-shot villain status, but it feels good for the same reason it feels bad. Superman can't see a creature that is attacking him so he is getting beat down, but Lois manages to resuce him by keeping her video cameras pointed towards the creature so that Superman can use those images to fight the creature. Naturally, the cover lied and he was actually beatable. Its an action focused issue and doesn't offer much more than that, besides Lois further cementing Clark into the friend zone he desperately wants to escape.

Verdict: B. Its not good, but its nowhere near bad and that's good enough for me really. This week has kinda sucked overall, and its weird to say that this was actually one of the stronger issues this week.

Teen Titans 2

So, its not the "Tim Drake is a badass" story like we got last month, but its a pretty solid issue. We open on Kid Flash talking to a person named Donny through a cell wall, while Bart thinks over what he should call himself now that Kid Flash has so much stigma. From there, we go to Cassie and Tim who try and have dinner, but Cassie is constantly going off on Tim for no viable reason. He seems to dig it since he openly checks her out, and after she gives him her couch to sleep on, we get this.

Much of the focus is on tracking down a bug creature in LA that is attacking people in the sewer. Tim figures out what she is and tracks down the thing's human sister. Turns out, NOWHERE is also looking for the creature and has sent someone to catch it. The merc here is kinda cool because he constantly refers to himself as we, which made me think we might see a teen Two-Face type thing, but the actual thing was kinda cool too.
Tim fights these guys off and apparently the third brother gets attacked by the bug creature, Skitter. After taking out the teleporting mercs, the bug turns on Tim, but Cassie flies in and saves him, then leaves, leaving Tim to carry Skitter out to safety. Meanwhile, Bart has gotten a chance to escape, and although this Donny he was talking to has disapeared, he find's a door marked Solstice with this inside:

Not really sure what or who that is... but its kinda creepifying.

Verdict: B+. Solid issue and I look forward to reading more, but I kinda feel that I will lose interest once Superboy enters the picture. Good ride til' then I suppose.

Voodoo 2

Softcore Porn: the Comic (like the cover didn't say enough already) just put me off really. We open on Voodoo, still in the body of the FBI agent she killed, having sex with the guy's female partner. Eventually, she finds out that her partner died in the strip club and tries to take down Voodoo, but is unable to, and instead of killing the agent, Voodoo just leaves her be and leaves for a diner where she starts freaking out because a Green Lantern (Kyle) is nearby. And to answer the horndog question- yes, the straight/lesbian/alien sex takes up more than half of the issue. Its just beyond bad.

Verdict: D. I gave this thing a pass last time. I can't in all good conscience do that this go round. Its a hot mess, and as much as I love a half naked attractive woman, I don't see the point in what's happening with this comic. DROPPED.

Well, that does it for the month of October. Round 3 is coming up and if you're wondering about the score, check in with the Keeping Score post.

DC's New 52 Week 3-4

Sorry I'm late. Been way too busy to keep up here lately, but I'm going to try and race through these so I can finish before month 2 begins.

Batman

If the point of the New 52 was to introduce new readers to these characters, then I think Batman needs it the least, and this book knows that. He's a character that has been on tv almost every week since 1992, is the basis for a game that, according to Guinness, is the most critically acclaimed video game of all time, and was the star of a movie that grossed well over a billion (with a b) dollars. I think the world kinda knows who he is. So, how does this book open?

By having a battle royal beatdown in Arkham Asylum, that, Riddler and his stupid head aside, is utterly fantastic. The twist here comes with the Joker joining the fray and fighting WITH Batman against the loose criminals. (Perhaps he was just saving face, after his last appearance? Yeah, that was a bad joke indeed...) I won't spoil the reveal here, but its a pretty good surprise and that's just the first few pages. After the fight, we get an awesome shot of Batman going on rooftops to meet with Gordon, and the art here just nails both scenes perfectly.

I hate the new Batsuit with all its seams, but the this is drawn, its like every shadow is giving birth to Batman, and its great. Gordon's expression is perfect as well, The book goes on to introduce readers to the characters, thanks to the facial recognition software that Bruce has gotten for the party.

I cannot put into words how much I love scenes with the bat-family, mostly for the intereaction with the Robin's. The rest of the issue begins a story that seems like it has 7 different storylines at once. Bruce Wayne under investigation for funding Batman, a new rich guy in Gotham that will no doubt be integral to the story, someone leaving clues and a warning for Bruce Wayne before they die, and my personal favorite- the return of Harvey Bullock. I love Bullock/Batman scenes quite a bit, especially when its fairly reminiscent of the animated series' interactions. The book also leaves us with a pretty nice cliffhanger that may link to the adventures in Nightwing, but we shall see.

Verdict: A. This is a fantastic book and it links right back to what Snyder was doing with Detective comics before the relaunch. Strongly suggest picking this one up.

Birds of Prey

Man... all the promise I hoped that this series would have is just right out the window. Its just plain boring. We have Black Canary and her partner Starling, being hunted for the murder of someone, but they are still operating as heroes, so that's pretty standard. They fight some invisible assassins and save a reporter who is apparently grilling them for the murder rap. We get a flashback of Barbara and Dinah talking about the team, and its still questionable whether Oracle was ever in existance, but we get a hint that Katana will be joing the team soon. As they finally finish rescuing the reporter, he gets a phone call, and then he explodes. Reread that sentence. Yeah, that's this book.

Verdict: D. There's a reason no one but Gail Simone wrote this book, and as much as it tries to reinvent a team and make it readable, it fails misterably. Also, the most exciting characters on the cover were Katana and Ivy... where were they? Why? I may have to read this next month just to see how they fit in, but as far as I'm concerned, this book is dropped.

Blue Beetle

Oh cool, I've read Spider-Man, too... Really, this is pretty much a Spider-Man type story. Outcast teenager in the wrong place at the wrong time gets a bug attached to him, and he becomes a hero. Or we assume he does, as the book ends with him getting shot in the back, triggering the scarab to come to life and bond to him. By the way, this scarab has never been touched since ti came to earth, which means that the continuity and life of Dan Garrett and Ted Kord are both wiped away. Or so it seems... I'm hoping I'm wrong.
Verdict: C. Its jsut a really boring and uneventful story, despite having a Green Lantern appear, as well as two teams of super mercenaries fighting over the beetle (Warp, Plasmus, and Bolt vs. South American villains that I could recognize but can't remember their names). I'm going to give it one more month before making a decision.

Captain Atom

Oh cool, I've also read Watchmen. Though Capt. Atom was in fact the basis for Dr. Manhattan, that's basically what the hero has now become. The ripoff of the character and technobabble was so ridiculous I actually had to put it down for a while. All the soldier mentality that made the character compelling, or a reason to link it to some of the less strong war books out right now is out. This thing just reeks of mediocrity. His powers now are a lot more like Firestorm, and he also has a death clock on him, like Spawn- the more he uses his God-like powers, the sooner he will die. That being said, the art here is really nice, and it certainly disconnects Cap from the rest of the cast as he is drawn with blurry inks while everyone and everything else is much more solid, further cementing his non-human status

Verdict: C-. I'm pretty sure I'm dropping this, but I will still read the next issue and if I don't report on it, you will have your answer.

Catwoman

Before you read this, I strongly suggest you check this article out: Now, we can begin with this hot mess. have you ever thought- "I wish I could read a comic and watch softcore porn at the same time?" Well, now you can. Is there actual nudity? No. But there are 18 gratuitous cheesecake shots in 21 pages, not counting the cover. Also, this happens:

Frank Miller once said "It's better with the masks on" in a panel of All Star Batman and Robin. Then apparently Judd Winnick made 1/3 of his comic go into detail why and how that can be true.

Verdict: C. Despite my bashing, I actaully think this comic could go places that aren't T&A and I will be reading next week. So, consider it on probation.

DC Universe Presents

So, is DC just turning their stories and characters into movies and television series, now? Because let me tell you... this new season of Quantum Leap is really throwing me for a loop. We get the basic Deadman origin- he was a serious dick... and then he died. Now he jumps from body to body until his soul can be at peace. Our story here finds the hero staring at the body of his next host an amputee Iraq war vet with survivor's guilt, and as we find out about this guy, we also get a peek at some of the other lives he has affected over the years. As is the standard every week apparently, Madame Xanadu shows up and is mysterious, and then leaves without being any help at all. And it ends with Deadman giving an ultimatum to the gods about what he wants to do with his afterlife.
Verdict: B-. I feel like I should hate this comic, but strangely enough, I dug it. The premeise is really problematic for me but the writing is pretty nice overall. The art is also fantastic, and really sells it. I just wish I could get into it more so that it seems worthwhile.

Green Lantern Corps

You know those Undercover Boss shows where someone who is well known and excellent at their job tries to do a very basic job and it doesn't work out for them? This is kind of like that for Guy and John. Guy is trying to get a job as a gym teacher/ football coach at a local high school, but he keeps getting accosted and questioned about his Green Lantern life. Finally, the school turns him down because he can't promise to always be there for the kids, and he is a magnet for danger, which puts the kids in danger. John on the other hand was a respected architect before becoming a soldier in the first place, so naturally he goes back to the job. Using a ring to create a building for some people, he is upset to find that they want to cut corners with the safety to save money and he basically gives them hell and flies off and meets up with Guy. Meanwhile, Green Lanterns are being killed by this invisible force (again with the invisibility? Seriously?) and then a bunch of weird looking fish creatures get slaughtered by this invisible thing draining all the water. Guy and John reminisce about how easy things used to be and how Hal and Kyle can get away with being normal since they wear masks. Then they get a call to check out the massacre. The end.

Verdict: A. I was reading Green Lantern Corps before the reboot, and this did nothing to dissuade me. Definitely keeping this one.

Legion of Superheroes

This book is like running headfirst into a brick wall of continuity. It honestly makes em wonder if they even told Levitz that there was going to be a reboot. Like maybe this was supposed to be a third part of a 6 part series, and he just didn't get the memo. Even with, and I'm not exaggerating, 32 explanation boxes of who this character is, where they are from, and their powers, I'm still completely lost. It is unreadable, and I can't tell you anything. Its better than Legion Lost, and I'm sure Legion fans will like it but not me. There's a reason my favorite Legion story involves Superboy Prime killing incarnations of the team for 4 straight issues.

Verdict: D-. What more can I say- inaccessable and inpenetrable. Dropping should come as no surprise.

Nightwing

Still not sure why we have a red costume here, but whatever. Its not a bad comic, but its nothing new. I really liked Dick Grayson, and I did miss the days where Bruce and Dick operated together, but the fact of the matter, and Snyder nailed this with his last issue of Detective, Nightwing wasn't built to be Batman- he's still Nightwing with armor on. So when we have a comic where Dick is getting used to his new/old life, and revisiting old friends, and then he gets gutted by a Not-Wolverine villain.

Verdict: B+. I will keep reading for at least another couple issues, just to see where they go with this storyline in relation to the setup in Batman.

Red Hood and the Outlaws

If you actually read the article I linked to back in Catwoman, you know the major complaint with this book (if you haven't- go do it now): Starfire's complete mischaracterization. The book does hint that she used to date Dick Grayson, and was a member of the Teen Titans, but she has no memory of any of these adventures. But the guys are actually fairly well done. Arsenal is actually better in this form since he's not eating dead cats, missing an arm, high on heroin, and fighting himself on whether or not he's evil. And Jason Todd? Well, his moving mouth helmet certainly bothers me, but there is some interesting stuff with him. For example, maybe as a throwback to how he was in the Flashpoint universe, he comes to break Arsenal out, in a fat suit and dressed as a priest. Then the priest explodes to show our "hero" with all of Roy's toys. Still, I'd rather see the continuation from Batman and Robin 23-25, where Scarlet exists as the third member, and that would be a much better series. Its not irredeemable, but it has a long way to go.

Verdict: D-. This may surprise some folks, but I'm not going to drop this. I think there is some potential if they can get it together, so this title is on probation.

Supergirl

Honestly, I barely remember this comic. I could use Grant Morrison's famous origin lines from All Star Superman, but there really wouldn't be much of a point. There's very little dialogue, she takes several pages to crash on Earth, then she fights Russian robots, then Superman shows up to talk to her. That's it. Its a beautiful comic though.

Verdict: C-. This will be a probable drop, but I will read the next issue, just to see if it gets any better. Kudos though for giving us a fully clothed female character this week who isn't sex focused or made of cheesecake.

Wonder Woman

I'm not a fan of the character. This comes as no surprise to anyone I've ever really talked to. She's boring, and highly onde dimensional most of the time. Plus she has a weakness to being tied up by men... so yeah. That all being said, this comic was fantastic. It should be noted that the two best issues of the week were the first and last alphabetically. There is a great mixture of mythical and modern civilizations, and while we aren't given much of a back story to WW, we are given Hermes, and some insane centaurs that look straight out of a Mignola book. I mentioned with Supergirl how happy I was to see a fully clothed heroine in a book. That doesn't apply here, but there is no cheesecake and women are drawn the way that women should realistically look in a comic book. You can see Diana above- no ridiculous cleavage or ass shots. This is Zola:
She is startled by Hermes while walking around her house in this outfit and she never changes. Its a very real type look, and she never is portrayed as a one dimensional sex object. Its actaully refreshing given the feminist outcry that comes from some of the other books out this week.

Verdict: A-. A very strong start from a Wonder Woman series, and I think I may have to check out some other great runs of Wonder Woman (there's only like three) to help me release the grudge I have. Onto week 4...

All Star Western

To most who know me, the fact that I love Jonah Hex should come as no surprise, despite having one of the worst movies I have ever seen attached to the name. To get away from the bad taste that the movie left, this was wisely titled something else. Gray-miotti have been on this character for a very long time so its no wonder that they nail the characterizations here with little trouble. I like to think that the series could go on forever with Amadeus Arkham and Jonah Hex as partners throughout, but I'm sure they will hate each other before the end of this arc. Its a lot like Unforgiven, but there's actually a reason for the two characters to be around each other. There is one pretty cheesecake-y character, but her fate a few pages later is kinda gruesome enough that it doesn't really translate to sexy:
Verdict: A-. A fun romp through turn of the century Gotham turned out to be a lot better than what I thought it would be like. Good times... I'm hooked.

Aquaman

You know how everyone makes fun of thsi guy? Well, this book will remind you on every other page about how much of a bad rap this guy gets. Some of the jokes are pretty funny... some, not so much. But the truth is... this is the kind of book the character needed for an introduction. It just establishes the character as something that people should respect, which happens maybe once every five years or so in a panel or two. So, highly enjoyable comic with a sense of dread with these pirahna creatures from the cover killing people, but its all cool, I'm sure they will be taken care of soon enough, and have an actual villain confrontation.

Verdict: B+. Its a fun comic that has just enough success as it does stale jokes. Personally, I was hoping for an Aquaman like the Brave and the Bold version. If you haven't seen that one, go youtube that now. So, the comic isn't "Outrageous!"... but its not bad at all.

Batman: The Dark Knight

Oh cool, I've read Batman #1 too. Yeah, this thing is just a crappy rehash of a comic we just got a week before. It opens on Bruce at a party where he is accosted for funding Batman, then he meets a woman who flirts with him and tells him he will have to catch her, then he gets a call to head over to Arkham for a breakout. So, its kinda reversed, eventwise. I did find it interesting that only Mr. Freeze is used in both breakout scenes. But this time, everyone is hopped up on Venom, Bane's drug of choice (wonder if he'll get any screen time...) and Batman knocks them all out and goes in after Two-Face, who apparently started this whole breakout thing. Then this pops out:
Pointless ass shot #4 billion... So she just shows up and then runs away without any dialogue, and I am scratching my head as to the purpose besides linking back to the woman from the party who this obviously is. So, the police and Batman are running through the asylum looking for Dent, and what do they find? The most unintentionally hilarious final page of any comic so far...

Someone should tell him that Batty Boy isn't frightening... but neither is calling yourself something you're not. He still has two distinct faces... It would, honestly, have been better if they had called him Mega Two face or Ultra Two face or something with a strong adjective at the beginning.

Verdict: C-. Its a kinda dumb comic that looks even worse in the shadow of Batman's first issue, so I will read this next week, but I'm pretty sure it won't get reviewed... so another Drop.

Blackhawks

So, its an unintentionally funny Team America with a cast that no one cares about fighting terrorists, which are never named, nor the country which they are doing the fighting in. Also, no one really flies a plane... which is kinda their whole deal.

Verdict: D-. Maybe its because I'm not a war guy but this thing did absolutely nothing for me. Even the guy they call Irish actually being Russian couldn't save this thing. Dropping and couldn't care less.

Flash

I have a lot of mixed feelings here. First off, I have mixed feelings on the Flash. I grew up on, and was very familar with Wally, but up until a few years ago, I knew nothing about Barry except for the fact that he died and saved the universe. Now, in the wake of the recent announcement, it appears that never happened and that Wally never even existed... which definitely blows, but I've been preparing myself for that eventuality since Barry returned. Visually, this comic is top notch and fantastic, but the story is just kinda dead in the water. There's no real enemy and Barry isn't fleshed out much besides dating someone who is definitely not his, in continuity, wife, Iris. I hate to give such a short review for a character that caused the entire relaunch, but there really isn't much more for me to say here.

Verdict: C. This book is on probation so I'll make my drop decision with the next issue.

The Fury of the Firestorms: The Nuclear Men

While certainly the longest title in the relaunch, it certainly doesn't offer much. We open to some sadistic killers, as all Gail Simone's stories do, killing some poor family for being possible terrorists, and its as dark as you'd expect. But Simone knows how to lace nice and subtle comedy into the darkness.

So these assassins are on the lookout for the final piece of some energy source, and are killing their way to some answers. Apparently, Dr. Stein, who was the original second part of Firestorm has been killed already, so now I have to wonder why the two characters are being brought together in the first place. Apparently, Ronnie is a popular football jock and Jason is a bitter and racist nerd working for the school newspaper. Ronnie is shown to have one friend in the comic, and this guy is black, and then Jason claims that he is racist, since he's a white quarterback. Then Ronnie, for no reason whatsoever has a really earnest moment with his mom where he asks her why he doesn't have any black friends. Its just incomprehensible. Evil bad guys show up at the school to find the final piece of the MacGuffin, when Jason activates it accidentally, turning the two teens into Firestorms (and the female assassin into Killer Frost, interestingly enough), and despite the awesome Bro-fist we get from the cover, the moment they come in contact, they become the giant evil FURY from the cover. Its just dumb.
Verdict: C. Much like Flash, this one is on probation... I'm anxious to see where it goes, but I won't keep reading forever. Probationary status achieved.

Green Lantern: New Guardians

We have a revised origin story for Kyle that includes him taking a piss in an alley behind a bar when he gets his ring... and that's about all that happens. His refridgerated girlfriend seems to be out of continuity now as he was flirting with this happens. Jumping to the present, we see that several members of the various Corps have lost their rings for no apparent reason, and they are all headed for Kyle. Shortly after having the rings attack him, members of the other Corps show up and claim Kyle stole the rings... so basically, nothing happened that we didn't already know was going to happen based on the two sentence description? Fair enough.

Verdict: B-. If I didn't know all thsi stuff anyway, I don't know if I would have such an issue with the plot of the issue. Because of this, I'm going to keep reading... mostly for the appearance of Larfleeze in a few issues. But after that, it will be hard decision time on dropping it.

I, Vampire

There is one who leads a small group that wants their species to live peacefully with the humans, while the other leads a large army that wants to conquer humanity, and that there was never an option for peace between humans and their kind. Sound familar? That's pretty much the summation of every Prof. X/Magneto comparrison since the beginning of the Xmen. So, now they have two similar characters, one being an Edward Cullen type vampire, while the other is a sexy vampire who stole her costume from Witchblade. Then ehy have sex, fight, have sex, fight, and so on. The only catch is the bit about how vampires hate superheroes because they are more powerful that vampires and protect humanity. Its a bit heavy handed at times, but the truth is that this is not 1/8 of how awful I thought it would be.
Verdict: B. Solid piece of work here and I will definitely be back, even if its just for another couple issues.

Justice League Dark

Besides the fact that the tarot cards are wrong on a number of levels, this comic certainly has its ups and downs. I was prepared to hate it because of how I felt with Secret 7, but I actually didn't hate this. Its not good by any means, but its not awful. My biggest complaint is that John Constantine is arguably the best character featured, and he gets the least amount of screentime. Basically, much like Secret 7, June Moone/Enchantress is going insane, and its up to our magical heroes to show up and stop her. The real Justice League shows up first though, and while it is fun to get Superman, Wonder Woman, and Cyborg all taken out with a magical teeth tornado, somehow the comic makes this a rather boring event.

Verdict: C-. Much like other books listed in this blog, I've got to put this one on probation and see how it goes from there.

Savage Hawkman

So, Hawkman gets a complete reboot here. We open on him burning his costume, but then the costume explodes, and kickass archaeologist Carter Hall (So there's some Indiana Jones) wakes up three weeks later. We quickly get some back story that he has developed a drinking problem recently, which seems like a throwaway fact, but it will be important later. So, anyway, his team has found this alien life form that looks like black slime and it draws power from all the things it kills. naturally Carter doesn't have his costume at work... also because he burned it. But when he gets angry that the life of one of the workers is threatened, the armor just comes out of his skin. So we have a rage inducing superpower (like the Hulk) and then a drinking problem in a suit of really awesome armor (Iron Man). Finally, the demon from Fantasia shows up to announce that he, much like Freddie Mercury before he found out you get the bad stuff too, wants it all.

So, by touching Hawkman, the armor starts to peel off and we are left with what we always see as the Hawkman costume. I never thought a version of Hawkman would win me over, but it did... but that was Kyle baker's run in Wednesday Comics... this thing is just a mess.

Verdict: C-. Its a beautiful comic, and it shows that Philip Tan definitely knows what he's doing, but this thing just limps along and doesn't answer any questions about anything, least of all Hawkman's beyond incomprehensible backstory or origin. I will read it next month, but unless it really moves me, I won't even report on it. Dropped, it shall be.

Superman

Let me start out by saying that this comic did everything wrong that Action Comics did right. We open on the Daily Planet being rebuilt after it was blown up... and we never found out why that happened. This comic also contains the line, and keep in mind that this was written by George Perez who has beein in comics for nearly 40 years and has won numerous literary awards, "This thing is a Tower of Babel of incomprehensibility." Really? Clark Kent also points out that print media is dead... in a comic that is considered print media. Maybe not teh best move, DC... Speaking of journalistic integrity, Clark Kent is serious about the issue and then makes a joke, to himself, about how he interviews himself for his Superman articles. It's amazing when everyone is all "How the hell did Clark get the story?" and Perry's like "Apparently he was already there!" Clark is literally stealing jobs by saving people and then WRITING ABOUT HIMSELF SAVING PEOPLE. WHAT A DOUCHEBAG. I did, however find this moment to be great, solely for the fact that the comic wants you to feel like Lois and Clark should be together... but you don't feel liek Clark really deserves her for a second... so it comes off like every bitter guy who has ever been friend-zoned, but he actually can hear what's going on with the love of his life. I, in no way, resemble that last sentence, of course.

Verdict: C. I will read for another couple months at least, and hopefully something fun or exciting will happen. but if its not better in a couple months, I will have no problem dropping it.

Teen Titans

This book needs an i imprint on it so bad. This thing reeks of Image Comics, and while there is nothing wrong with that, there is something that doesn't work at all here. Especially the two covers we have seen so far. The original cover by the way seems to be scrapped in favor of this one, featuring the new gay character who, based on what I've seen, I'm really hoping is the first to be a part of the Titans curse. And no, not because he's gay- much like Barbara Gordon's roomate, he is friggin obnoxious. But luckily, he isn't in this comic so there's a plus. Also not in this comic: Freakish bug looking chick, and the black cloud chick. When I first heard taht Titans was going to have 3 guys, 3 girls, and a gay guy, I actaully got excited because that's the standard cast for MTV's Real World and there's a bit you could do with a superhero reality show. Fingers crossed, guys. Anyway, this issue could be called Tim Drake is a Badass, Part 72. He's online, acting as a blogger when his place gets raided by the government, and Tim is as calm as can be while he's about to be killed for interfering with NOWHERE's plans for super teens. I may have mocked the birdwings originally, but the integration into his clothes, so that he can just flex his metal wings out of a hoodie certainly got my attention. He's basically Cyclops, Archangel, Beast, and Forge all in one... and that's pretty kickass. Speaking of Xavier's kids... the book opens with a fire at the Xavier school (no relation) and firemen try and put it out. Kid Flash, who is just as obnoxious as ever, and I pray for Deathstroke to show up and shoot his kneecaps again, shows up and tries to help. However, since he's an idiot, he causes a backdraft from his speed and the whole place blows up, with no casualties, luckily. There however is some hinting towards the openign to Civil War where an irresponsible hero causes major problems, but we'll get that rehashed story when it happens. The rest of book focuses on Tim and Cassie, Wonder Girl, on the run from the government. Finally, NOWHERE releases their secret weapon: Superboy.

Verdict: B-. I have to wonder why this isn't called Young Justice, since that would be far more identifiable with the millions that watch the cartoon instead of the thousand or so that read the comics.

Voodoo
Oh, Voodoo... You are the first DC comic to actively star a black female and for 20 of those 22 pages, what do you look like, and what are you doing?
Yeah, that's right... being a stripper with ridiculous cheesecake. And while there is some beautiful art here, its still the same female drawings we have all seen. Oh, and if you're wondering what she looks liek for the other two pages?

Yeah... Species. And she's attacking a thinly veiled Agent Mulder character, who she kills and then becomes because she is a shapeshifter. And I'm now so sick of that image, I can't get any pleasure at all out of it. I need something other than "look at the pretty ladies!/But I'm CRITIQUING you looking at the pretty ladies so it's OK!/SURPRISE VAGINA DENTATA," you know? Oh, and if you're wondering where Scully is, she goes for a smoke and then gets attacked by street thugs. This is the 5th book of the relaunch to have people just randomly getting in brawls with characters and their street gangs. This is comic books, not Double Dragon.

Verdict: D+. To be honest, this thing reads like a stripper revenge fantasy that was written by someone who is not only not a stripper, but has never been to a strip club in their life. This all seems like its stripping for stripping's sake, which I'm not a fan of at all. I'm on the fence, but I think I'll put this book on probation, just to see where this goes in issue two.