New 52: Round 2, Week 1

Ok, as we begin Round 2, DC sent out two more books. I guess these will take the place of the two books I dropped: Men of War and Green Arrow. I tried to read Men of War but it was so boring I actaully fell asleep. Green Arrow wasn't boring but it was dumb. The Smallville version is quick to get on the readers nerves and I'm done with the series. However, he may reappear in my upcoming musical Smallville: Turn off the Clark. Yeah... that was a dumb joke. Moving on...

Action Comics 2

So, I'm not sure if anyone is aware of this, but Lex Luthor is a really sore loser. At teh end of the last issue, Supes was captured by the military and this issue picks right up with his torture at the hands of Luthor and Gen. Lane, which mostly involves the hero being strapped to an electric chair and shocked with enough power to light Metropolis for a day or two. Lex is determined to find out the secrets that this alien is keeping from him, and even more determined to find his weakness. Lois arrives on the base and accosts her father for being so cruel and that Superman should be freed. He brushes her off and she is then helped by her exboyfriend John Corben, who Superman fans may remember for becoming Metallo. Luthor finally stops the torture to gloat about the way that he captured the Man of Steel and that eventually he would be exiled to whatever planet he is invading from. Supes uses this chance to catch his breath and gain the strength to escape, all the while mocking Lex for talking too much. Cue this:
He gets out, winks at Lois, and then flies off, all the while maintaining his devil-may-care attitude. Lex is fired by Lane and Corben decides to undergo transformations so that he can be powerful and make Lois love him (Spoiler: It won't).

Verdict: A-. My only issue with the story is that they make Luthor seem so weak and cowardly, and as a longtime Lex fan, I don't buy that about him for a minute.

Animal Man 2

Man... this comic just keeps being awesome and downright creepifying. We pick up right where we left off last time with Maxine summoning all the nearby dead animals to be her pets. Wile this scene is horrifying, it is also very endearing to see the family sticking with one another and the daughter whose naivete is really overwhelming. She refuses to send all the dead animals back to being dead so their house is just full of dead animals which the kids just love playing with. Maxine tells her father that something very bad is coming and they need to go save the web of life. When he asks what that is, the same blood tattoos that appeared in the last issue appear a bit more permanantly all over his body. An angry neighbor shows up with Buddy's son in a headlock, saying that the kid was trying to break into his house and Maxine does what any little sister would do- turns the man's arm into a chickens claw. This is apparently very painful and Buddy and Maxine quickly leave. Meanwhile at the San Diego zoo, some pregnant hippos have died, but their bodies keep expanding, which scares three zookeepers who try and run away from the weird sight. They don't make it and are eaten by the three creatures from the previous issue, which take the forms of the three men, announcing that the hunt for the avatar has begun.

Verdict: A. Very solid book that is definitely in the top five books in the whole relaunch.

Batwing 2

This... is a very personal comic, and everything feels really up close the entire way through. From beginning to end, there are only a few panels where more than two characters are featured. The art is really grainey, but with the African setting, it kind of feels like it really works. The story is still pretty standard. Batwing is stabbed through his lung and barely survives. He then adorns his armor, long before he whould physically be ready to do so, and heads out to fight Massacre before he kills another retired hero, one very reminiscent of Black Lightning.

Verdict: B-. Its certainly better than it was last month, but it just doesn't hold my attention long enough. I'm going to give it another week, but I don't expect to stick with it for long.

Detective Comics 2

So, I gave this comic a chance last time because I knew it was your standard Batman vs. the Joker type story that a lot of comics start with. This time, it takes a complete turn. I don't think the Joker's in it, but I could be wrong. This thing opens with Batman going to Arkham to investigate Joker's attempt to recreate Face/Off, but is quickly run off by Jeremiah Arkham, who, last I checked was an inmate of Arkham and not the head of the place. And by "last I checked," I mean that he was in Batman #1 as an inmate with a skull painted on his face. Anyway, some detective work is done with the help of Gordon and Bullock, and Batman is led to an abandoned apartment where he gets clued in with a call that Gordon was kidnapped. Tracing the call, he finds a family of patchwork faces, straight out of Twisted Metal Black, who fight and eventually subdue Batman. Before going in for the kill, they show what they've been busy while he was on his way over:

I'm going to tell you right now- if he's dead, I'm going to spin kick Tony Daniel into a woodchipper. Also, is it just me or does it look liek Bruce is laughing? The endings have been unexpected, but to what end?

Verdict: C-. I really should drop this into the icy depths, but I need to finish this storyline to be sure, so it gets a pass for a little while longer.

Hawk and Dove 2

Rob Liefeld's art isn't so awful in this issue so we are left to the writing strengths... which means this thing sucks and I don't really have enough joke material or alcohol to try and make this story any good. We do find out by the end that there are other bird characters, which brings our total to Hawk, Dove, Condor, Swan, and Osprey. Deadman shows up for a panel and Dove acts like a bitch and tells him to leave her alone... so I officially have no reason to stay with this thing.
Verdict: D. This should come as no surprise that we have our first casualty this week. DROPPED.

Justice League International 2
While I still don't buy the credible threat of the giant robot as much as the comic wants me to, I still enjoyed this comic. Its not as strong as the first issue but it does have some real characterization. Booster is shown to be more than a pretty face with product placement ties, August General is shown to be an honorable warrior who believes in the code of following your commader even if you disagree with him despite remaining at odds with Rocket Red who never walks away from a fight. Guy returns after Tora is badly injured but its questionable whether he will stay on or not. Batman also gets some fleshing out, appearing as a man who will not be intimidated, even by the United Nations. All in all, its a pretty standard bridge issue, and I expect the revelation that there are several giant robots to defeat, although the team couldn't even beat one, to factor heavily into the team's mentality in the next issue.

Verdict: B. Its not perfect but it does what it needs and I look forward to the next issue, no doubt about it.

OMAC 2

So, this I feel gave us the better look at what the comic is really going to be about. We have Kevin Kho who is being constantly haunted via electronic devices by Brother Eye who has a surprisingly funny persona. Kevin finds his way to a diner in Texas, and finally eats something for the first time in a day or so. Upon realizing that Kevin has no money and can't pay for the food he's just eaten, Brother Eye sends an bulletin to the local sherrif's dept that someone at the diner is a STAR Labs escapee. Its not Kevin, surprisingly, but the cook who appears to be the new Amazing Man and who was on the run from the government after being the subject of several tests. Facing being returned to teh government he activates his powers and turns into a huge rock creature. Kevin tries to run away but, in perhaps the best moment of the week, Brother Eye tells him that its "Time to OMACtivate!" Personally, I think "It's Morphin' time!" would have been more effective... but just barely. After the fight goes for a while, Amazing Man decides to try and absorb the OMAC skin, but upon doing that, he goes under the control of Brother Eye, who then atomizes the guy for "future use." Cutting over to Star Labs, we see that Mokkari is talking to someone who apparently represents Checkmate who we are purposely not shown until the last page where Brother Eye intercepts the call to challenge this Checkmate guy personally. Maxwell Lord. Really anxious to see what his role is in all of this, especially if some of the previous OMAC stuff is out of continuity.
Verdict: A-. I am still loving this series and I have no intention on dropping it.

Red Lanterns 2

Thic comic is just dumb. If this didn't have the final page it did and was issue one, I would have dropped it completely. We open on Atrocitis, again standing over Krona's dead body, and whining about how his rage cannot be quenched. Then we get some stupid story about these two warring planets and one of the planets sent a fighter jet to go kill some people on the other planet, but they had bad intel and accidentally killed some kids. Atrocitis shows up, kills the pilots, then asks the surviving kid if he feels better and the kid runs away. Atro gets sad, and says he's going to pick a new leader for the Red Lanterns... but who?
Verdict: D. Normally a D gets your comic dropped, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Dex-Starr becomes the new leader, or at least gets a much larger role. But this is almost definitely a DROP.

Static Shock 2

So apparently the whole arm loss thing was a fake out. Apparently the blad was so sharp that it cut perfectly and then the would closed up just as fast. This comic is just ok, and I'm just not moved at all. Which is a shame because I'm such a fan of the Static cartoon. I wish I could tell you what happened here but it was so average that its just a bore.

Verdict: C. Average comic gets an average grade. I will read next month's issue but I think this is probably headed for the drop pile

Stormwatch 2

In the same sense, we have Stormwatch which has a team full of people that I don't care anything about fighting against the moon, which has been possessed. I just don't care much for any of the Wildstorm bunch so I feel like this is also going into my drop pile. Its a C comic and its only redeeming feature is explaining how Stormwatch operates with the Justice League, which is pretty much by creating evidence that points towards a scapegoat.

Swamp Thing 2

So, this comic has a LOT of dialogue and words. There's a two page spread that is probably 85% word balloons. The original Swamp Thing, who was a WWI pilot talks to Holland about becoming the Swamp Thing again and saving the world from the Other, which all of life, both the Green (vegetation) and the Red (those with Blood) fears. Pretty sure this thing should be called the Black but I feel like that's kinda passe and expected. There is a definite link to the Animal Man comic but no crossover seems to be in sight. Anyway, Holland still walks away from his duties as Swamp Thing and goes on living his life. Or, he would, but he gets attacked by a horde of the backwards head people, and is only saved by a passing motorcyclist that picks him up, then puts a gun to his face. The rider is Abigail Arcane, and while I don't know or care who that is, I like this comic a lot.

Verdict: B. It's nowhere near as good as its animal based cousin book, but this thing manages its creepiness and its "world's in danger" attitude well enough that I have no plans to drop it. Now, onto the freshmen series...

Huntress 1

For me, this book seems really lackluster and there's nothing here to indicate that its different from any other Huntress story. She goes and kills or seriously wounds bad people, and in this case its slavers, which are kind of the go to villains for street level heroes because its hard to be on the side of people who profit by selling people, usually children, or making them work for free. They are awful and should suffer, we get it. Glad this is a miniseries and not a full blown series... maybe she'll return to Birds of Prey and make that book readable again.

Verdict: C. Although I'm glad to see something by Levitz that's not unreadable like Legion, this comic is just average. Its nothing special and I just don't have time for mediocrity when I have fantastic books to read. DROPPED.

Penguin: Pride and Prejudice 1

To be honest, I'm still sorting this book out. I feel like its the same kind of story we got with Joker's Asylum a couple years ago. In fact, that story was regarded as the best Penguin story in decades, and Batman wasn't even in it. THis is the exact same story- people were mean to me, I love birds, the mean people killed my birds and made me mean, some random guy barely slighted me and now I'm going to ruin his life in overkill ways that are normally saved for the build of an Aristocrats joke. The difference is that in the JA story, the Penguin's story was a tragic one and you feel bad for the guy all the way throughout. He was in love and because he can't help who he is, he creates a prison around himself. It was a one-shot story and it was great. This comic however shows him as unlikeable throughout and although we get some tender bits with his mom, who he loves, he is just detestable from start to finish. I guess I just don't understand what we are supposed to get from this. We know he's not going to die. We know that he won't go to prison- that doesn't solve anything. And he's not going to realize the error of his ways because that destroys the character. The story will probably end with him being depressed and alone, but I don't care. I have seen, via solicits that this is comparable to what Azzarello did with Joker and Luthor, but he gave us narrators that we wouldn't hate until the last parts. Man of Steel was through Lex Luthor's eyes, Joker was writen through the eyes of a henchman. I can't feel the same way when my narrator has tax information hacked, an old woman and an apartment burned to teh ground, a couple driven off a cliff, and an innocent young woman injected with AIDS all because this guy accidentally ran into the narrator. I'm done with this, I'm pretty sure.

Verdict: C-. Unoriginal story with a narrator I hate, and the only thing keeping me on the line is the possibility that it might be a good turnaround story like Riddler got before his turn as a detective. But unless the story is leaps and bounds above this, Drop.

So a few books got the stamp of disapproval, once again dropping my number of books. Check the "Keeping score" each week to what things currently look like, as I'll update it as much as I can.

DC's New 52: Week 2

Man, where can I begin on this group? Some were just really stellar, while others fell flat. I feel like alphabetically, I just lost steam with the last set since the first two issues were so great. But since I can't think of a better system, here goes nothing.

Batman and Robin

I still hate the way Robin looks on that cover, but whatever, it actually doesn't carry over into the really, so I need to get over it. We open on Moscow, as a man is running away from something which is revealed to be an extremely muscular Batman. The criminal is caught naturally, but before the Batman can speak to him, the criminal is shot in the head by a floating gun. The invisible assailant goes to work breaking the arms and legs of the behemoth Batman, and then as the Batman is bleeding, he asks who he is, and the invisble guy claims to be "Nobody." Cutting the familar Wayne Manor we see Bruce in his classic thinking pose- in a chair, staring at a painting of his parents, with a storm outside. "Its time for a change." Is all we are given. Bruce goes to wake Damien up, but Damien's been waiting for his father. They are going to head out early, before patrol, to make an important stop. I'm not going to lie- Damien is a friggin prick in this book. Bruce tries to explaine why 10:48 is such an important time for him, and Damien rolls his eyes for the entire speech. Bruce asks Damien to show some respect, and he responds with the fact that they are just names on dusty old pictures, to which Alfred walks in, gives a verbal slap to the face of Damien, more for implying there was dust than the disrespect for his friends. Bruce is somehow completely patient through all this, because let's face it, this is the first real interaction these two have had since 2006. Damien complains that this constant reminder of death is kind of stupid, and Bruce agrees, stating that this will be the last time that he comes to Crime Alley to honor "the moment I watched my father bleed out of a sucking chest wound as my mother choked on a hole in her throat." He will now honor their wedding anniversary instead. The next scene is actually beyond my words, so here goes:

Like I said, the fact that Bruce hasn't punched the shit out of that kid blows my mind. What follows is a standard "bad guy's trying to get research" scheme and the Dynamic Duo show up. They bicker the entire time, and when the criminals use a break to steal the Batpod (or gyro- whatever this weird underground thing is that they arrived in) Damian follows, despite Bruce's orders not to. He catches up tot he crooks and disables something on the ball which makes it lose control. One of the thugs starts firing his gun which blows the whole thing up, seemingly killing the crooks. Batman is beyond pissed about this, and basically drills the kid to point of comparing how much worse he is than Dick, Tim, or even Jason. Scene ends with Batman saying that until he earns his trust, then he won't be Robin. Cutting back to Russia, we see Nobody slowly dropping both the dead crook and the barely alive Batman into acid and dissolving them, finally saying that its time pay Bruce Wayne a visit.

Verdict: A-. If DC was intent on bring in new readers, this was a pretty good book to do it with. The characters are quickly fleshed out and given personalities. Anxious the see where this storyline goes, honestly. I just hope we can get past the "DAMIAN! YOU'RE A LOOSE CANNON!" "F-CK YOU, DAD!" stuff pretty quick... kinda grating after a while.

Batwoman

I'm going to tell you straight up- the art in this book is beautiful, and if you are going to get it, I advise you to get it in print rather than digitally, because the page spread's just don't work as well on a screen. The same thing that makes this comic beautiful is also its biggest weakness. The art is amazing, but its a really short read (16 of the 22 pages are two page spreads) with little to no answers in it. We open on this ghost, who is apparently kidnapping children and sucking their breath out, attacking the children of a Hispanic family. Batwoman is unable to fight off the spirit and the children are taken. We move to Capt. Maggie Sawyer's office at the Gotham Police Dept. where the family is telling the Captain all about what happened that night. They leave, and pass Kate Kane in the lobby, as she stares at a picture on the wall. We are shown that this is Renee Montoya, and then Sawyer and Kane begin to flirt just in case you forgot that the three women mentioned in this comic so far are all lesbians. Kate goes home and trains with her niece/cousin Bette Kane, formerly known as Flamebird. The two argue over whether or Not the girl is ready to be a hero and go out on patrol. We then cut to the Offices of the DEO where Director Bones (I actually love this character) is sitting with Agent Chase and gives her the orders to bring in Batwoman- we are not given a reason why... just that she needs to be brought in. Cutting back to Gotham, the bodies of 7 kids have been dragged from the lake, and Comm. Gordon and Sawyer share concerns about this, but neither character seems have any depth here. Back at the Kane apartment the two heroes are arguing over Bette's role and the fact that she needs more training when Kate's father arrives, and she just berates him for the events of her run in Detective Comics (not explained well- apparently some required reading for the new people). He is then kicked out by Kate. Cut to Kate and the lake/river scene when Batman arrives and says he has a proposition.

Verdict: A-. I don't think its as solid storywise as it should be but the art makes up for it. I will definitely keep reading but for me its just like that girl who sits near you and is amazingly attractive, but once you get to know her/she starts talking, you realize there really isn't anything exciting about her, but you are perfectly fine with that.

Deathstroke

"I wanna be the very best. Like no one ever was. To catch them is my real test. To (kill) them is my cause..." Not gonna lie... this entire book is just balls to the wall action, with Deathstroke "Ash Ketchum-ing" all over the place. The first panel tells you that Deathstroke is a "super badass" and panel two lets you know that he will cut off your dick at a moment's notice. You want to know how to introduce your character as a guy not to be messed with? Those two panels. By the end of page three, he has murdered 11 people with an extra bigass sword, I'm pretty sure he got from a Final Fantasy game. We cut to Slade Wilson meeting with an associate, Kristoph, who has a job for him, but because the circumstances, he's going to have to work with some up and coming assassins. Slade is beyond pissed and shows it by throwing a paperclip so hard, it cuts a fly in half and cuts the shoulder of Kristoph's suit. Cut to three teenagers who are bickering with one another and waiting for the fourth member of the team (which has two really stupid names that are argued over throughout the mission- Alpha Dawgz or Harm Armory), who they call Lovetap. It comes as no surprise that this is Slade, and he, like the reader, hates them from the start. Kristoph gets them up to speed on the target; a German scientist who cannot be taken while on the ground for political reasons, so they will have to kill him in the air. Slade makes a plan, and away we go. Upon hijacking the plane, Slade finds that there's more than just weapons on the plane- there's some biological weapons as well. Apparently, this guy is being guarded by soldiers with Clayface DNA which makes them really hard to kill, but not impossible, as Slade shows us. As he prepares to reboard his plane, he blows up the scientist, takes the suitcase he came for, then jumps, reflecting on how "not bad" these assassins were. Back home Kristoph and the team are celebrating the mission when Slade comes in. He says that they proved to be good at this, and that makes them competition, and he doesn't want or need any. So the three teens are killed and he beats the crap out of Kristoph and shows him the contents of the briefcase which apparently horrifies the man. Slade hits him again and tells him to clean up, and then walks out.
Verdict: B+. It's highly predictable, but if you want a book that puts action first and anything else second, then this is the book for you. Its also a great pickup read. Good news as well- the costume on the cover looks nothing like what's inside the issue which was a real saving grace. The costume shown above is awful.

Demon Knights

So this comic suffers a bit from time travel fatigue where we don't necessarily jump back and forth, but there is a clear change in time, and there are those who are from other times. We open on the last night of Camelot which I will assume is 1200's AD, where Lancelot has been tasked with returning Excalibur to the Lady of the Lake, and he does what he needs to, as some women in a boat go past him. One of the women, revealed as Madame Xanadu doesn't want to see the sword lost again so she dives after it, only be hit with some sort of magic. Cutting over to the castle, Merlin has bound the demon Etrigan but when the castle falls, the demon will be free, so he sends for a knight to come and when Jason of Norwich arrives, his soul is bound to the demon's. Jumping 400 years in the future to the 1600's we see that Jason and Xanadu are now travelling partners, who are teaming with a friar of some sort to find their way. Meanwhile, a man is bringing a baby in front of a king and queen, claiming that they asked for the youngest child in the village and that was his son. The king, revealed to be Mordru (though he looks and has powers similar to Shang Tsung), takes the child and upon touching it, it turns into a demon, tells him that his path is correct and where he needs to go, and then the baby explodes. Its pretty insane and the man is in tears as he is drug off by guards. Cutting back to our travellers, we see that the two are more than just partners, as they flirt back and forth with one another, as they pass through a small village. They hear shouting and they see a big brutish man with an axe pounding on the doors to a bar, demanding service. This man is revealed to be Vandal Savage, who apparently the two travellers run into at least once every few decades. The three all drink together and discuss things. Vandal points out that he was jealous that they were present at the fall of Camelot, though while he has no ethics, he likes to see them in other people. They are interrupted by what appears to be a woman in golden armor, who says her name is Sir Ystin, the Shining Knight. Vandal points out the obvious, and that his nethers say that Sir Ystin is not a man. Commotion at the bar cathes their attention as a man with fancy gold named Al Jabr is being denied service. This upsets another patron who is identified as Exoristos, and she is apparently a huge strong woman who hails from an island where men are castrated for fun. Before any end to this issue can arrive, a horde of enemies, at the command of the Questing Queen, is coming to take the town over. Our six strangers begin to fight, and Jason changes to Etrigan, which comes as no surprise. What does however come as a shock is that the first thing Etrigan does is just make out with Xanadu and they discuss their sex life for a good four panels. Clearly, Jason and Etrigan are unaware of what the other does with the body. So as everyone is fighting, we find that Mordru and the queen are angered by the resistance. So she suggests they do what they always do when faced with a problem. Figure out where it is...
Which is an obvious solution to every problem of course.

Verdict: B+. This is the kind of book I'm glad the relaunch brought us because things liek this would never have gotten the press they needed to, and this is just a fun book. I would however like a little more info on half of the characters, and I know a new reader would like to have that as well. And Vandal as a good guy is a great concept, and one I hope we get to see more of. But my biggest complaint is that the rhyming is gone. With the exception of the change of forms, there was not a single rhyme.

Frankenstein, Agent of SHADE

I loved Frank's miniseries during Flashpoint, and man, does this thing not disappoint. There is so much stuff in this comic and it all just works beautifully. There was so much speculation as to the identity of Japanese schoolgirl assassin on the cover and the reveal... well, its something. We open on a lake in Washingtom where a grandfather and his grandson are doing some fishing, when their dog gets scared and runs off intot he woods. There is a bad howl and yelp and the skinned body of the dog is thrown back, just as a huge shadow covers the two people. These creatures are beyond disgusting and they remind me a lot of the beasts from Animal Man's dream. We then cut to a scene of Manhatten with a tiny silver ball floating around it, while we get computer generated narraration. This ball is call the ANT FARM- a 3 inch indestructable ball that acts as the headquarters for SHADE, and it is only accessible by teleportation and shrinking, thanks to the technology of Dr. Ray Palmer. We see Frank teleport in and is filled in by the liason Dr. Belroy. The facility is managed by robots that live for 24 hours then decompose and become fuel for the Ant Farm. Frank finds this disconcerting, as the birth and death of artificial life is something that is very dear to him, but he drops his argument when he sees what has become of his father...

Huh... well, that happened. Moving on. Frank quotes Milton as a way of defining his feelings and Palmer interjects that he has always been more of a Keats man himself. Getting to the mission at hand, Frank wants to know what happened to his wife, who apparently is the best SHADE agent of all time. Apparently, the entire town has been overrun with monsters and the Bride has disappeared of the radar, so Frank has been tasked with getting in there, killing the monsters, and getting his wife out, in six hours or the entire town will get nuked. Cutting right to the action, Frank wants to jump right into the action, but Father makes him wait for his new field team: The Creature Commandos- Amphibian Nina Mazursky, Werewolf Warren Griffith, Vampire Vincent Velcoro- augmented with Man Bat serum, and Khalis, a mummy and a medic. Frank is shocked that his father is messing with science and creatures again, but the little girl cannot get over how awesome her creations are- and honestly, neither can I. Father makes a comment that maybe if Frank was willign to try new things once in a while, his wife would still love him, which as barbs from a little girl go, that one stings pretty bad. This gets insanely gritty as the creatures go on a full attack to kill the monsters and its a well earned action sequence. The characters are defined quickly: Griff is a loyal soldier, Velcoro whines and is extremely brutal, Nina is way too scientific, and Khalis is just mysterious. The mummy senses life nearby and he and Frank go into a church to find some survivors. They eventually find a tomb that contains an old woman with a cross protecting tons of kids. The end.

Verdict: A-. This is a great book, and maybe its too much greatness for the space it had because the ending is really cheap in my opinion. I am not a fan of this ending. Its a lot like OMAC, where we are being swept up in an adventure from the get go. And there is something insane or new every three pages: Living in a snowglobe with the Atom, Father is a thinly veiled Hit Girl, The Bride of Frankenstein is a four armed superspy, The Creature Commandos are back, with Velcoro using Man Bat serum he modified so he wouldn't suck like everything else with Man Bat. I especially love the characterization of Frankenstein as a guy who wants to help people, but has no patience for anyone's bullshit. The kind of guy that if you cry for more than 5 seconds, he will shoot you in the face with an angelic shotgun, because that is how this protagonist rolls.

Green Lantern

So, Green Lantern basically is the least changed as far as continuity goes in the new universe. This picks up exactly where War of the Green Lanterns ended last month: With Sinestro and his impossible to destroy or remove ring which he got from Hal Jordan when he was banished from Oa for killing a crazy and evil Guardian (Don't get me started on the bureaucratic bullshit with those little blue people. So, the Guardians, who cannot get rid of the ring, and will not kill a Green Lantern, just set the guy free and tell him to do his job and protect his sector. Sinestro is just as WTF as every reader, but whatever, this is standard Guardian crap. Ganthet speaks up that although he is no longer a Guardian, he thinks this is a pretty screwed up idea, and all the Guardians jump him- end of scene. On Earth, Hal is hanging out with Carol at his apartment, when he sees a guy from across the way threatenign and hurting a woman. Hal goes hero and jumps across the 7th floor balcony and crashes into the neighboring window and starts beating the guy. He did not notice the camera or film crew behind him, as he is an idiot who didn't realize there was a movie being filmed. He subsequently arrested and Carol has to bail him out. Meanwhile, Sinestro is watching out for his sector, by spying on his homeworld of Korugar, with giant green binoculars. He sees taht his former subjects, the Sinestro Corps have taken over the world and are ruling it with as much brutality as could be expected from that group. One of them spots Sinestro and goes to kill the spying Green Lantern, then hugs Sinestro as his leader, then believes that Sinestro is a traitor, and then gets his head blown off because Sinestro is just that kind of guy. Cut to Hal and Carol out together on a date, and discussing how now that this ring stuff is behidn them, they can finally be a couple. Hal agrees and says he needs to ask her a question. She is elated that he's finally going to pop the question. However, his question is about her cosigning on a car for him since he hasn't driven in over 5 years. She flips out, slaps him, and takes off, leaving him to walk to his apartment. Opening the door, he finds Sinestro waiting for him with a proposition...

Verdict: B-. Its a decent start to the series but I would have expected a lot more from Geoff Johns here. The book would have been great for first time readers, with a little backstory, and they would be set. But for a continuous reader, this issue felt like it was just spoonfeeding a lot of info that we already knew. This feels more like an "in between" issue than an opener.

Grifter

I have never read a Wildstorm book in my life, and this doesn't push me in any direction towards picking up the series. Its basically Sawyer from Lost, as a gun wielding "hero" who is being hunted by his soldier brother after he kills a people who were possessed by demons/ghosts/blue energy creatures. But of course, only he can see the creatures so... its a lot like They Live except without all the Roddy Piper awesomeness. Anyway, there's this whole mystery of where Grifter keeps losing time- 17 minutes, 17 hours, and 17 days. I mentioned before that time travel writing could be tricky. This is a prime example. This thing is just a mess. The comic ends with him sitting in a graveyard and putting on the red mask for no reason whatsoever.

Verdict: D+. Like I said, this thing is just confusing, and there's not much that would draw in new readers. The only saving grace is the wonderful art. I think this is going with Men of War where I'm going to read it next week, but for now, consider it DROPPED.

Legion Lost

This was without a doubt the least friendly for new readers. This requires a lot of knowledge from the reader about the Legion of Superheroes, and their villains, and we get zilch as far as explanation. Seven characters wind up going to the past to retrieve some guy with a deadly virus in him that turns him into a monster, and he hates humans. So, the 7 Legionaires argue and argue and argue over and over and over about what to do instead of actually doing anything productive. They finally catch their guy but he tries to escape and blows their time bubble up, and then two of their own (Chameleon Girl and Teleport Bug?) along with the criminal disappear, while the other 5 are trapped on some world.

Verdict: D-. This thing felt rushed beyond all comprehension. This is terrible art, terrible writing, terrible characterizations. I commented that Green lantern felt like there was a lot of handholding for a character in explaining it to new readers, when all we needed was a page. This book has no explanation for anything, and Legion is a series taht requires a 26 volume encyclopedia to understand. I think this book was to serve to those afraid the new 52 would be bad and this is a taste of the way things were... but if that's the case, I want this new universe. This book is without a doubt, DROPPED.

Mister Terrific

I'm pretty sure this book was doomed from the getgo, but I actually didn't hate it. This guy has never ahd a story to himself, much less a whole title. I think I said this once before that this is one of those Affirmative Action titles, like Static, or Blue Beetle, but those guys have a huge fanbase. This guy has zilch. He had a nice moment in OMAC Project years ago, and he's been a minor support character in JSA for years. There's just not a reason to care. Anyway, we open on our hero, Michael Holt, fighting an enemy in London and he's using science to beat the guy and save lives. Its pretty boring, but the comic clearly is trying to pander to me:

After some people are saved, we get a nice awkward moment where Holt explains himself.

Not too bad. Randomly, we cut to a guy that goes from being a regular guy to an insane asshole for no real reason, and then he walks off being a prick to everyone. Despite this random bit, I like Wallace's writing style so far, and he actually manages to get an origin that's not whacked out or in connection to the original Mr. Terrific or the Spectre. He was a brilliant scientist and athlete whose pregnant wife died in a car accident, and although he tried to kill himself, his son from the future showed up and told him to keep trying, so now we have a superhero who fights crime with science. Its not a terrible origin, but who is he explaining his origin to? Its not the reader...

Whoa... whoa, whoa, whoa...that is Power Girl (or Karen Starr as she is known outside the costume). And they are clearly "friends with benefits"- a fact that gets drilled to death later in the issue, as does the ebony and ivory of it all. The two go to some charity function for Holt where he is meeting with a senator to discuss education reform, and of course, some black woman shows up and berates PG for, what I can only assume, "being a cracker." PG just shrugs this crap off with a "we're just friends, whether I want that or not" line, and then there is some class commentary that's beyond predictable and heavy handed for a comic like this. So already we have a love triangle between a suicidal brilliant African American superhero, a random African American woman that works for Holt and adores him, and the white, well "built" Kryptonian cousin that is the cause of 95% of all comic realted wet dreams. I guess I can't blame the guy. Anyway, for no real reason, Holt gets possessed by this asshole problem/disease and turns into a murderous prick towards the senator. End of story.

Verdict: C+. There's a lot of stuff that's light and a lot that's way beyond heavy handed with this book, but I think after a couple issues it will find its footing. I think this was a pleasant surprise and it will get at least another week from me, so we shall see what happens.

Red Lanterns

As much as I love these guys, the Red Lantern's are supporting characters at best. They show up, vomit blood everywhere, and then be on their way. They, like so many characters with boosk this week, do not need their own series. That being said, I would pay money for a monthly series starring this guy:
Dex-Starr is the coolest animal character ever, and I request that we get a series about the Legion of Super Pets. It would be 1000x better than Legion Lost, at least. So anyway, there are some intergalactic bad guys who are doing some bad stuff that isn't really specified, and Dex-Starr shows up to kick some ass. He kills half of the crew, and gets taken out by an electrified leash... as all animals do. Cue this scene:

It comes as no surprise that he kills all of the guys and then takes Dex-Starr back to Ysmault and feeds him, then puts him down for a nap. I can't lie this is the dumbest thing for the "Master of all Rage" to be doign with his time, and the other Red lanterns know it too, and are now ceding control of the group from him. Atrocitis gets pissy and storms off to see the dead body of Krona the rogue guardian, who he had dibs on killing but was preoccupied somewhere as Hal Jordan killed the little blue creep. So, Atrocitis decides taht he and his group will go out and avenge evils and kill the guilty, but he's also afraid that his team won't follow him since his whole plan to get justice for his own people's slaughter has been hijacked every step of the way.
Verdict: C+. Its an interesting series, but its about a bunch of one dimensional characters, a guy who, liek Sinestro has an evil name and deserves no depth, but is getting it anyway, and a cat that everyone fell in love with and thought was a pretty funning thing until his origin was shown to involve rape, murder, and some serious animal cruelty. And I can say that this is without a doubt the best art I've seen from Ed Benes, but since its Ed Benes its still pretty horrible and nothing looks like its real life counterparts- see the cat above.

Resurection Man

Not gonna lie, of all the comics I read this week, I was looking forward to this one the least. Not really sure why. Its a decent issue about a character that only shows up for events and important moments, and I guess I was lost on why he would get his own series. Dying and coming back with new powers is kind of a cool thing, but you still have to die for that to happen. Mitch wakes up with magnet powers, and from there, he's just chased by this angel spirit/shapeshifter thing that says its time for him to stop dying, and for him to die for real. Its just a dumb concept to start with and I wasn't fan of this circular comic. Tacking on the Body Doubles at the end was an ok twist, but they seem like they are a pair of Harley Quinns, and not respectable assassins.

Verdict: C-. I cant say too much good or bad about this thing. It was readable. I wouldn't reccomend it it, but I wouldn't stop someone from getting this thing either. So, I guess, consider this on probation. Another bad week and it will be DROPPED.

Suicide Squad

This was the absolute worst thing my eyes have taken in a very long time. Everything was wrong on levels I can't even begin to describe. Harley was all wrong (now a murderer trying to get the Joker's attention), Deadshot lost his signature mustache, King Shark doesn't really talk much, and Amanda Waller is no longer a wall, but a rail. The most prominint black female in all of comics used to be 5 feet of 300lb. aggression, strength, and intimidation. Now she looks like every other 36-24-36 woman in comics. Anyway, what we have is 19 pages of these characters being tortured while we get flashbacks that make no sense. You'd think with her center placement on the cover, that Harley is the main character, and while she gets a little more screentime for cheesecake reasons, its not really true. Harley is character who has nearly 20 years appearing in TWO forms: Dr. Harleen Quinzell, renound psychologist; and Harley Quinn who is dressed in a full leotard jester costume and black and white makeup. What we have here is just a sadsack that dances with corpses so that the Joker will care about her, until, of course, she is taken into custody by Black Canary's ass.

We get to see a nice action shot of the team walking through the snow to where they are now being tortured. It is however, unintentionally hilarious.

Its nice to see that Harley and her booty shorts and corset are perfectly fine to traipse through the icy tundra, but at least she's got a bomber jacket to keep warm. Just like they did for everyone. Even the guy who is LITERALLY ON FIRE. Anyway, there is a twist in the book that gives us an twist ending that was ripped from V for Vendetta, but that book actually earned that ending. This book? Not even close. So the surviving members of the team go on their first mission which we will see next time.

Verdict: F+. Now you know I don't give F's out unless I absolutely have to. This is beyond well deserved. The one good thing is that the art is actually really solid, and seeing how much Glass enjoys gore and violence for the sake of it, the idea that all of these characters with crappy redesigns will be killed and replaced with the more familar characters. Which is why, that despite this being the most awful thing this week, I will be sticking with the series for one more issue, just to see how it goes. So, probation period is a go.

Superboy

Finally, we reach the last issue of the week and its not so bad. The problem is that this thing is laced with continuity issues. Writers have promised that most of Teen Titans is keeping with continuity, but if this Superboy is in that title, I can't imagine how that is possible. We have a clone using the DNA of both Superman and Lex Luthor so we are starting with his moral issues as he runs through all these fake hologram rehearsals for how the NOWHERE group can best use the hero. Heading this group is Dr. Fairchild, who will no doubt become her Gen13 form very soon, and the liason to the Superboy is Rose Wilson, equipped with both eyes, so we will have to see how all of this plays out. Its a pretty good introduction, but as of right now, it reads like We3 with a superpowered teenager.

Verdict: C+. It wasnt bad or good.. it just kinda existed. Its throwing a lot of the stuff we love about Superboy- the life in Kansas, the growth in a lab, the "My Two Dads" issue with Luthor and Superman, and the fragile mental state- and throwing together some Fairchild and Ravager makes for a decent comic... it jsut wasn't really for me. If the inclusion of those two characters is the best part of a Superboy comic, then that tells you something. I'll give it a couple more issues before I make a drop decision, so I guess its on probation.

So, that's one half of all the new DC titles, and I really think there is just as much good here as bad. Let's see how the second half turns out. I've read 26 books so far and next month I will be reading/reviewing at least 20 of those, which is a good thing.